


Thespian

by EtchedGhost



Category: South Park
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gen, Let's just assume that the worst and the best of everything COULD happen in here, M/M, Multi, Other, Reader Voting, Who knows? It's up to you
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 09:01:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29964012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EtchedGhost/pseuds/EtchedGhost
Summary: The students of South Park Theatre have joined to perform plays of amazing spectacle.The twist?The readers decide the roles. And through the chapters, pairings will be made.HOW DOES THIS WORK?This is a Theatre performance based fic, and it’ll be based on a voting system from readers. In the fic, the characters will get together to perform plays (willingly or reluctantly).Each new play will bring about a cast list, and I’ll post the play and the roles, and you can vote for which characters will play what part.Any characters go. There will be scenes showing the rehearsals for the show, and the eventual production.It’ll have Kenny and Craig (because Crenny bias), but the roles they’re given will likely dictate how much they hang out/how much interaction they have, so if they never act in scenes together...dat's gonna be a slow burn baby XD. All other couplings are on the table, and characters may romantically interact with Craig and/or Kenny during scenes and because of roles being played.Enjoy!
Relationships: Kenny McCormick/Craig Tucker
Comments: 12
Kudos: 10





	1. Break A Leg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Prologue to this series.

* * *

##  **CHAPTER ONE**

##  **Break A Leg** **  
**

* * *

**Chapter Song (Craig’s Song):** I Don’t Know How But They Found Me - Choke  
**Chapter Song (Kenny’s Song):** The Smiths - I Want The One I Can’t Have

* * *

  
  


Craig was absolutely late. And it wasn’t his fault, it was totally his roommates’. They’d stayed up almost all night working on a project. Which might have been fine, but they had an awful fucking habit of humming along with the music they listened to while working, which meant that earphones were essentially rendered useless. He didn’t like to be late, that meant slinking into class and hoping no one noticed. And there was always someone that noticed and made a fuss, usually a teacher, sometimes one of the assholes in the front row. 

And he was in a bad mood. He’d left his books at home, his phone was almost dead, and most importantly, he’d left his hat at home. Today was shaping up to be the shittiest of days. There was no way it could hit any lower. 

At least he’d managed to flip his stupid fucking humming roommate off before leaving. 

* * *

Clyde hummed impatiently as he stood, waiting for his friend. Who said they’d meet him here. 

Except they weren’t. 

“C’mon, where the hell are you, we’re gonna be late.” He groused quietly to himself, checking his phone once again. 

Why? Why today of all days? 

He decided he was going to give them five more minutes, and then leave without them. That was loyal enough in his opinion. 

* * *

Loyalty, yeah right. What even was the point in his loyalty? 

Kyle tugged on his jacket, irked at the way things had worked out this morning. Bad moods, no coffee left, start of new term, and of course it had to start like this. 

He tried to zip up his jacket, cursing at it, and then left it. He’d deal with the cold.

He was better than this, he was a model student, he didn’t have time to be late. 

And man, his roommate was being an ass this morning. He expected to see him running towards college from their classroom on the higher floors. 

* * *

Kenny didn’t want to be running. It was the last on his list of things he wanted to be doing at the asscrack of dawn. But unfortunately, time was not on his side this morning. Good thing he’d been on the track team in high school, so speed was definitely something he had. 

He was absolutely out of practice though. Geez, how was he out of breath already?

And he wouldn’t have cared in the past about being late, but his teacher was a bitch of a dragon, and he did NOT wanna deal with that.

His roommate had been an utter a-hole as well. Because somehow it was his fault his roommate was in a bad mood. It wasn’t on him. 

He checked the road, both ways, and then again. 

He did not want to be dying right now. 

* * *

Someone was gonna die today. Definitely. He didn’t know how, and he didn’t even know who, but someone was gonna pay for his bad mood. 

Cartman was pretty sure he’d forgotten everything. Absolutely everything. Apart from one important thing. Who his teacher was. 

At least he wasn’t late. That would fucking suck. He was actually doing pretty well in college, and he wouldn’t ever admit it to anyone, but...he enjoyed his classes. 

But this morning fucking sucked, and it was all his roommate’s fault. 

So yeah, someone was gonna get their ass kicked today.

  
  


* * *

“Stan! Dude, get up. We’re gonna get our asses kicked if we turn up to class late. You know how she is.”

Stan groaned into the mattress. Today was not a day he wanted to happen.

“Fuck off.” Was his less than cheerful reply. 

“If you don’t get up, I’m leaving for class without you.”

“Whatever, fucking go then.”

A sigh of annoyance, and then a door opening and slamming shut. 

Stan hated today.

* * *

Hate was a strong word. Not as strong as his coffee was, but pretty damn close. And Tweek alternated between sipping it, and half walking half jogging down the road. 

He’d planned to walk with his roommate, but that hadn’t worked out. That was a nice way of putting it. Hence the comparison between hate and his coffee. He’d had to grab coffee along the way rather than at home for...reasons…

He was kind of nervous today. Most of last term had been theory, and small exercises. But this term, it was when it all began. And the idea was...frightening. 

Which is why it would’ve been great to have his flatmate with him. 

He sighed, blowing on his coffee whilst power walking. 

Maybe next time. 

  
  


* * *

Next time, he’d leave the fucker to deal with it himself. This is what happened when he tried to do the occasional ‘good deed’. Being good was totally overrated. 

Damien scowled at everyone and everything. 

This was absolutely his roommate’s fault. He’d been all ready and organised, and then BOOM, his roommate. 

He should turn him into something. Like a mosquito. 

Except he’d promised his father he’d be ‘good’. And dammit he was trying. 

Did it count as good if he turned his roommate into a bunny instead?

* * *

What the hell was ‘Bunny”?

Butters craned his head. The Asian girls had been at it again. Now, it was a picture of him...and was that...Kenny?

Oh. Bunny. Butter and Kenny. He got it. 

It was...certainly artistic. He just didn’t understand why someone had left it under his door. 

He also didn’t understand why he still had it, and was looking at it on the way to class. 

Maybe he’d show it to Ken. He’d probably get a good laugh out of it at least.

* * *

Token wanted to laugh. 

It would be better than crying he supposed. Or strangling his roommate. Of all days for him to pull this shit, it had to be today?

He had a perfect track record, and he didn’t want to ruin it. And his roommate was _ruining_ it. Token considered himself relatively chilled out, but his roommate really got on his last nerve. 

Still, he supposed he’d have revenge. His roommate was totally gonna be late. Later than him. 

Maybe that was a little petty, but whatever. 

* * *

“Why did the carrots hate the small green vegetables? Because they were being petit/petty….no, that’s terrible...ugh.”

Jimmy couldn’t figure out any of his new line up. He was looking forward to some improv to help shake up his mind. He was currently reaching the bottom of the barrel with his jokes. And he’d tried to run through some of his newer ones with his roommate, but...it hadn’t really worked out. 

He needed some inspiration. And fast. He had a mic night on Friday. 

* * *

Wendy hated her flatmate. They had spent the entire morning singing “Friday” in front of the bathroom mirror, and Wendy had been so tempted to throw something at them. And she’d left before they had. They were probably going to be late, unlike her. 

And it wasn’t her job to babysit them, they were all adults now, they knew how to tell time after all. 

Okay, maybe that was a little harsh, but the singing had put her in a foul mood. She wasn’t against singing. She couldn’t be, being a theatre student. Just, why did it have to be THAT song. It was a terrible song. And it wasn’t even Friday today! It was Monday, and god did she hate that. 

* * *

Oh god oh got oh god she was so fucking late!

Red hadn’t had time to do anything she usually would, and had resorted to grabbing her basic essentials (keys, phone, cards, college ID card) and bolting outside the door. 

She didn’t want to miss today. Today they’d start proper theatre productions. She’d been waiting for this since this course had started. And of course after an entire term of being on time, today was the day that she’d not looked at the clock for ages and let time escape her. 

She could make it, she just needed to focus and get there in one piece. Things could always be worse. 

  
  


* * *

Ugh, this was the WORST. Nothing for breakfast, no time for coffee, not even time for a quick bit of foundation to hide her panda eyes. 

Bebe could not wait to have her own car. Then problems like this would go far away. And first thing she’d do? Flaunt it in front of her stupid roommate. They totally could’ve helped her out this morning and hadn’t. Traitor.

This wouldn’t go unpunished. 

  
  


* * *

Nicole felt like she was seriously being punished for something. What, she didn’t know. She didn’t consider herself a bad person, and yet it felt like her Monday was shaping up into a cursed one. She’d slipped on her shower floor, because her roommate had spilt shower gel and not cleaned it up properly. 

She sighed. She should really have a talk with them when she got back from classes. Or maybe during classes. They were in the same course after all, so it wouldn’t be too difficult. 

She understood that her roommate had been busy and panicked this morning, but that still didn’t mean her roommate couldn’t be more careful. 

Maybe she’d speak to them after class. 

* * *

Class. Class class class

That was all that was running through Kevin’s head as he jogged down the road. He’d seen Kenny run past and give him a quick “On your left!” 

There was no way he was making it to class on time. Kenny was very unlikely to, and he was going a lot faster. But Kevin had made peace with that. He would accept his lateness, and decide it was worth it. 

The newest season of Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure had been announced. And he was utterly hyped for it. He’d spent far too long reading comments and thoughts, before realising that he was very, very late. 

He’d have to tell his roommate the great news when he got to class. 

* * *

Today was the day of great news, Gregory decided. Today was the start of his acting career, and he’d excel, and then onwards and upwards from there. 

He was born to act.

He hoped he had a role worthy of him, and that his acting partner that he’d work closest with was half...decent. He didn’t exactly wish to be..dragged down. 

It was fine, he would raise them up instead. They would all rise together, and be a theatre group worthy of praise!

* * *

She eyed them as they all entered her class. The clock showed they had barely a few minutes to go. And some had yet to show, which was hardly... praiseworthy.

And a few minutes after that time, Craig slunk in, sitting at the back as usual. And she was about to point it out, when Bebe walked quickly and quietly into the classroom, taking the nearest seat by the door. Followed by a very sweaty, annoyed looking Red. 

And she’d opened her mouth to chide the three of them. When Token of all people, walked in looking incredibly guilty. 

“I see some of us have no concept of time. Mr Tucker, Miss Stevens, Miss Taylor , Mr Black. This isn’t like you, I’ll see you after-

BANG

And Kenny skidded into the room. 

“Shit. Uh. Sorry.” And he grinned, not looking sorry whatsoever.

She sighed. 

“Mr McCormick. Good of you to join us. Thank you for being...subtle and showing some...decorum. As I was saying, you five-“

And another head poked in as Kevin looked into the room. 

“...You SIX. See me after class. Mr McCormick, Mr Stoley. Take your seats and stop distracting those who made it on time.”

And the two of them complied. 

“Now, as you all know, this will be the term we start our ‘performance’ section of the course. As part of your usual work, you will be required to partake in theatre productions. The college supplies a large amount of funding for the Theatre students to do this every year, and I expect everyone to participate in this in some format. Now, there will be a large array of tasks that do not just fall under acting. We will need technicians, effects, scene-dressing, costume, lighting. There will be something for everyone.”

And she tapped at the whiteboard. Just as Stan walked in. And she resisted the urge to groan. What was with these kids today?  
  
  
"Mr. Marsh, stay behind after class. Now take a seat before I lose my temper."  
  
  
  
And he grabbed the nearest seat available. 

“Now....I will note down the performance. Please let me know which area you would like to be involved in. This will dictate your focus for the next year, so pick wisely, as it will count for the majority of credits, and cannot be changed. You will not be required to audition for roles, they will be given and you are expected to stretch and expand your powers of versatility to fulfil that role. If this sounds like something challenging, I’d suggest focusing on an area outside of acting.”

And she noted the play down in fine cursive script. 

S W A N P R I N C E S S 

“I have placed sheets on your desk. Please tick which option you wish to fulfil. And I will then have an idea of who wishes to focus where. Please take a few minutes now to fill these out.”

* * *

Craig glanced at the other latecomers as they took their seats. And resisted the urge to sigh as McCormick took the seat next to him. Of course his luck had to be that bad. 

What was worse is that McCormick didn’t even seem to notice his dislike. He leaned towards Craig as he was busy trying to ignore him. 

“So Tucker, what you picking?”

“None of your fucking business.” He replied. 

“Ouch! Not the legendary asshole mode. Anything but that.” And Kenny mockingly clutched at his chest. 

“Save your ham acting for the stage.”

Because McCormick would clearly go for acting. He enjoyed attention after all, and it was the easiest way to get it. 

“You know Tucker, I get the feeling you’re gonna go for something boring. Like cardboard tree painting or something dull like that. I’m right aren’t I? Kinda a waste, you’re pretty good at acting when you get into it.”

Craig only did what he needed to last term to get through to this term. Who cared if he could or couldn’t act. So Craig ignored the idiot next to him. He was here for one reason, and one reason only. He wanted to get into audio engineering and stage technicianing. This was the easiest way to get that experience. He couldn’t give a damn about the acting side of things. 

And with his own sheet filled out, he noted the obstacle in his way. McCormick, of course he’d take the aisle seat. He wouldn’t be surprised if he did it on purpose to fuck with him. 

“McCormick.”

“Yup.”

“Move.”

“You know, there’s a magic word for times like this, right?”

“You’re right. Fucking move.”

“Make me.” And McCormick sat there, looking far too much like he was enjoying himself.   
  


Craig was not going to play his game, so shrugged. 

“You’ll leave eventually.”

And his sheet was swiped from his desk.

“The fuck McCormick?”

“Don’t you worry Tucker, I’ll drop yours off as well. Aren’t I just the greatest guy?”

“Whatever.” Craig wasn’t in the mood to start anything. If McCormick wanted to be an annoying fuck, that was on him. He wasn’t gonna play keep away with him. 

“Huh. Audio engineering huh…”

“You don’t need to read it to hand it in.” 

“Need and want are different things Tucker.”

“Just...fucking get on with it or move out of the way.”

“I’m going. Don’t you worry.”

And Craig for a moment, regretted letting McCormick do as he wished. And then decided it wasn’t worth the effort, not for a stupid sign up sheet. 

And task done, he put his head in his arms. The sooner they got through this, the better. 

And after a long, lengthy discussion on what Swan Princess was, the class was dismissed. Apart from the seven of them that had to wait behind. 

“I want to make sure that this won’t be a habit. It is important, both in and out of the classroom, to honour an agreement to arrive on time. Especially for the seven of you. Do you think an audience will wait for the cast to show up?”

Craig didn’t care. He just wanted to get through the lengthy intro to the important stuff. 

“Now...I expect you to be on time. Especially seeing as...yes...” and their teacher looked at her sheet. 

“It looks like you’ve all signed up as actors. And I cannot stress enough how-“  
  


Fucking. What?  
  


“What? He spoke out loud. She looked...irked at his interruption. 

“Is there a problem Mr. Tucker?”

“I didn’t sign up for acting.”

And she glanced at the sheet with a frown.

“It says you have.”

“Change it.”

“I can’t. Wendy took the sheets to be processed during class. And I received a confirmation email of enrolment for each of the students. If you’d made a mistake Mr.Tucker, you should not have waited until the end of class.”

Craig’s glare moved straight to McCormick. Who was very obviously trying not to laugh, looking far too pleased with himself. 

He wanted to hit him. Hard. Absolute fucker. 

“Can I help with other areas alongside acting?” He would kill McCormick if he’d just blown his chances. 

“Mr Tucker, if you wish to do extra credit, you are free to, by all means. However, do not neglect your acting in place of extra credit. You will be marked down if your main focus falls.”

Inwardly, he sighed in relief. Okay, so he could still do what he wanted. He just...had to do this stupid acting stuff as well. He was back to only wanting to hit McCormick. Still hard, but thoughts of murder had left his mind. 

“Can we go now?” 

The teacher sighed, but nodded. 

And the seven of them filtered out. 

“Later Tucker.” Kenny gave a wave and a smirk. And it was only Token’s hand on his shoulder that stopped Craig from launching himself at the annoying blond that kept pissing him off. 

“Dude. What happened back there?” Token asked. 

“McCormick was being a dick. But what’s new there?”

Token nodded. 

“Yeah. He’s always been kinda...antagonistic towards you, gotta admit. But I mean with the whole acting thing. Dude, I thought you wanted to focus on engineering.”

“I did. I made the mistake of letting McCormick anywhere near my sheet. And now I’m stuck for the year because of that prick.”

Token looked amused more than angry. 

“Well you’re a great friend.” Craig commented in a flat tone. 

“You’ve gotta admit Craig, it’s kinda funny.”

“It’s not. It’s fucking with what I wanna do.”

“Teacher said it’s fine if you worked on both.” Token soothed. 

“I guess.” 

“Besides. This is theatre after all, and you’ve acted before. You didn’t hate it right?”

Craig shrugged noncommittedly. And Token slung an arm around his shoulders.

“Cheer up grumpy. We’ve got an hour between classes, wanna go get a coffee?”

“...Sure.”

  
  


* * *

Kenny loved acting. More than anything. 

He didn’t like it when he had to pretend to be something he wasn’t. When he had to pretend to be an asshole, just to...get a reaction. 

Because a reaction was better than nothing. And yeah, that was probably really dumb of him, but he didn’t wanna give up the one thing that...kinda gave them a connection. 

“You’re really something, you know that?”

And Kenny looked up at Bebe’s approach. 

“Kenny. My darling Kenny. You realise when you pull stuff like that, it makes him hate you, right?”

“I know, I know. But what was I supposed to do?”

“Leave him alone?”

“Bebe, I can’t. You know I can’t.’

She sighed, and put an arm around him. 

‘There are absolutely easier and healthier ways to deal with this kind of thing. Antagonising and sabotaging him is NOT the way forward.”

“Bebe, what else am I supposed to do?”

“Not get him to a stage where he looks like he’s about to hit you is a good start.”

Kenny looked dejected. 

“This sucks. This fucking sucks. Why did it have to be him?”

“We don’t get to pick our crushes Ken. Just a fact. It’ll blow over eventually. In the meantime, try not to antagonise him so much. It’s childish, and he will retaliate if you push him.”

“He wants to hate me. I’m just...making that easier.”

“You realise how backwards that sounds, right?”

“I never said any of my ideas were good ones.”

“Just...try , okay hun?”

“Yeah. Okay…”

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Want to vote on roles for Swan Princess? Check out Chapter 2, or https://etchedghost.tumblr.com/post/645292558295187456/thespian-poll-time-the-swan-princessswan.


	2. Poll Time (The Swan Prince(ss)/Swan Lake)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Note: Don't feel you have to vote Kenny and Craig in the main romance roles for them to get together. Feel free to have a play. Their relationship building outside of theatre will be based more on how much they interact more than the specific romance roles. Same with other characters. Feel free to have all kinds of fun with it ♥️  
> (obviously if you want them in the romance roles, that's all good as well)

* * *

##    
VOTE TIME

## The Swan Prince(ss)/Swan Lake 

  
  


* * *

  
  
  
(Note: If you prefer to vote on Tumblr: https://etchedghost.tumblr.com/post/645292558295187456/thespian-poll-time-the-swan-princessswan)  
  
  
The time has arrived! The **first play** for the new fic series **Thespian** that South Park High/College will be performing will be The Swan Prince(ss)/Swan Lake. 

If you don’t know what these are, have a look here:   
  
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Swan_Princess](https://href.li/?https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Swan_Princess)  
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swan_Lake](https://href.li/?https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swan_Lake)  
  
  
  
Now, for the roles. These will be playable by any gender, so King doesn’t necessarily mean a male character has to play the role. Also, lemme know if you want the Prince/Princess to be as is, or if you want two Princes/Two Princesses/Two Prince(ss) etc. I’m keeping the other roles as they are for ease.   
  
There are no pairings at this stage of the fic. The eventual pairings will be down to who spends time together/acts closely together. There is an option to pick a sad and happy ending for this play, as one iteration has a happy ending, the other a sad ending. This will be kept hidden on what the winning vote was.   
  
I’ll fill in any minor roles with those not picked. I’ll also update this as people are suggested, and change if votes change to another role.  
  
 **I’ll keep the poll going for a few days, and then I’ll close it/delete it as a chapter on A03, and fill in any empty roles not picked.  
**  
  
Also, I’m 10000% including this scene: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InYZA-ieqC0](https://href.li/?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=InYZA-ieqC0)  
  


**Note: Don't feel you have to vote Kenny and Craig in the main romance roles. Feel free to have a play. Their relationship building outside of theatre will be based more on how much they interact more than the specific romance roles. Same with other characters. Feel free to have all kinds of fun with it ♥️ (obviously if you want them in the romance roles, that's all good as well)**

* * *

  
  


THE ROLES: SWAN LAKE/THE SWAN PRINCE(SS) (SO FAR)

**

**The King (Odette’s father):**

Wendy 2 votes

Token 5 votes

**

**The Queen (Siegfried/Derek’s mother):**

Red 4 votes

Wendy 2 votes

Token 1 vote

**

**Princess Odette (Main female protagonist):**

Kenny 7 votes

Bebe 1 vote

**

**Prince Siegfried (Derek). (Main male protagonist):**

Stan 5 votes

Craig 2 votes

**

**Benno von Sommerstern (Prince’s closest friend/friends):**

Kyle 5 votes

Craig 1 vote

Tweek 2 votes

**

**Baron Von Rothbart (Main evil dude. Wants to marry Odette):**

Craig 4 votes

Kyle 1 vote

Cartman 1 vote

Damien 1 vote

**

**Odile (Rothbart’s hench-person disguised to look just like Odette to seduce/fool the Prince):**

Bebe 5 votes

Kenny 1 vote

Tweek 1 vote

**

**Prince’s Valet:**

Dogpoo 2 votes

Tweek 1 vote

Clyde 1 vote

Kevin 1 vote

* * *

  
  
**ENDINGS**  
  
I will not reveal what people chose for this. I’ll just do it.  
  
 **Happy Ending:  
  
Sad Ending:  
  
**

* * *

Happy voting!  
  



End file.
